The Gray Place

DEE-PEE-ESS

Posted in Preizt, Riffs by mrfenris on August 4, 2010

The absolute best thing about healing on my Priest vs healing on my Paladin is that I can jump while healing.

I cannot just stand still while I play WoW.  I tried.  I CAN’T.

I am the spacebar clown referenced in the video.

Which is odd because I’m not a hyper person.  In fact I can be completely sedentary at times, my various layers of fat, chest hair, and cupcakes settling into a striated cross-section much like what could be found in a geologists dig site.  “Professor!  Come quick we’ve unearthed an entire section of Hostess Fruit Pies!”

But I can’t just stand there while playing WoW.  I jump, I spin, I flutter, I am the leaf acrobat upon the wind.

I get bored.  I don’t know how people can just sit there and stare at their character as they key board turn in place.  A side note.  There is nothing more painful than watching a character keyboard turn around so they can run to the outer edge and get cleansed in Ruby Sanctum.

Nothing.

Well at least until I see them do it on the Lich King.

Back to jumping.  Maybe it’s because I’m in “go mode” when I play.  When I played hockey back in the day my coach always used to yell at me to sit down on the bench, cus I’d be standing up watching the game, cheering on my team mates until my shift came up.  I can’t help it.

I love being able to jump and heal.  No more winding up that big huge fat ass Holy Light.

*Shift right-click on the tank*
*Starts to cast Holy Light*
*Player gets up to get another beer*
*Holy Light still casting*
*Player sits down and takes a swig of beer*
*Holy Light cast finishes and heals for 247824k.  98% Overheal.*

I do remember getting up once while I was tanking and peeing.  I came back and I still had aggro.

I once read a book called “Et tu Babe?”.  Twas amusing in the way that only a book about an author who steals and snorts Abrahams Lincoln’s morning breath to get high, has cybernetically enhanced geriatric bodyguards, and has sperm so powerful it can kill a woman, is amusing.

One particular part of the book saw the main character (who was an author) do an experiment where he would write a chapter of a novel while he had to go pee.  He found that because of his biological urgency he would rush his characters through situations and events.  For example if one of his characters was going to a four-year program in college he would instead unconsciously change it to a three-month program due to his full bladder.

If that was true I wonder if it could cause DPS players to DPS more to get the encounter over faster so they could find relief.

Maybe we ought to try it.  Mandatory bladder holds, until the progression boss is down.

Huntard: “Uh can I use the restroom before our next attempt?”
Raid Leader: “NO!  No ones pees until we get her down!!!!”

Puts a whole new spin on the term DPS.

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One Response

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  1. miakoda said, on August 4, 2010 at 5:35 pm

    Ya might wanna invest in some of those fancy NASA diapers if you go that route.

    Just sayin’. 😀


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